Chapter 5: Prison Break (I quit my job at Google today)

My resignation letter read as such:

Dear Google,

Breakups are never easy, and I wanted to write you a thank you letter in lieu of what I could not say to you in person. Over the past 3 and a half years you have assisted me in my continued growth both professionally and personally.

You made work easy by offering to feed me whenever I was hungry.
You gave me nice massages for a nominal fee.
When I was sick you gave me the time to stay home and recover.
You even did my laundry and washed my dirty dishes.

You showed me that work can be rewarding, and that people are by nature, good.
You showed me that it was possible to fight for a just cause, despite public opinion swaying the other way.
You showed me the kindness of those perceived strangers you call “Googlers”
Being with you also made me learn how to deal with high stress situations and achieving high goals, and I will take these lessons to heart on my journey.

Rarely, when some of your friends abused their power, (as is inevitable when you have so many friends) you consoled me with summer BBQs and teddy bears, though I know that you had no control over their day to day actions.

Most importantly I will remember all of the awesome friends you were able to introduce me to through your social circle. I met all sorts of amazing Googlers that I will continue to be friends with, even after our breakup.

I hope we can remain good friends as well, and I wish you the best in your future endeavors.
XOXO,

Signed.

On my last day, the goodbyes were easy to make, as I started at the eyes of my co-workers, some of them felt genuinely sad but happy for me. Others hid behind a general and fake politeness that detaches from authenticity. Even others, better friends of mine actually felt sad and “a little jealous” that I have the opportunity now to do my own thing. I felt fine. I felt like this was long overdue and I have actually stayed for too long.

Playing society’s game for 6 years, I have gone to a wide eyed college graduate to a more mature young man, who is jaded at the corporate game. The social programming that society has put in place to keep things stabilized. Play the game! Work the tough job! Win money for yourself! Buy the nice car! These are all short term fixes to true self esteem and core confidence.

Tyler Durden (RSD) on social conditioning and the state of advertising in this country:

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Why Your Life is Depressing and Why Pickup is Good

In reading Authentic Happiness (Authentic Happiness: Using the New Positive Psychology to Realize Your Potential for Lasting Fulfillment) today, I came across a passage by Dr. Martin Seligman that articulated the feelings i have had in the past few months. It also applied to our endeavors in learning pickup.

Dr. Seligman starts out by examining why, in the midst of the wealthiest time period in humanity’s history, human beings are as depressed as ever:

The sheer speed of modern life and our extreme future-mindedness can sneak up on us and impoverish ou rpresent. Alsmot severy tehcnological advance in recent times – from the telephone to the internet, has been about doing more and doing it faster… So invasive is this “virtue” that in even the most innocuous of social conversations, we can catch ourselves not listening well, but instead planning a witty riposte.

Another reason why the free hug campaign is so successful around the world: because we all want to belong:

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Chapter 1: Haven

Haven refers to “a place where ships may shelter from the weather or are stored”. Similairly in my life, college served as my own personal bubble and shelter from the world. Up until high school I had a pretty good life. Dad traveled a lot for his job, and we relocated from continent to continent with him whenever the time came. A side effect of this was that I went to college at a really young age. I remember dad driving me down to Natick mall late at night when we arrived in Boston, looking for a place to stay so we could continue our journey to college the day after. It wasn’t an easy road and I was glad that he came along with me, for I was only 16 and had no idea what to do.

The next day he left, and I was all alone. Although sad, I was also extremely excited. Finally! American College life! Let’s get this show going! The first year was great and we met a lot of cool people, but I had no real interest in girls. When I hit 17 and 18, that’s when things began to get frustrating as girls I meet will either become friends, or show no interest. It was almost as if I didn’t speak their language. Come Junior and Senior year, I was simply in denial and my ego prevented me from approaching and meeting new girls. There were 3 particular incidents I remember from college related to girls:

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Is a prince still a prince if he switches places with the pauper?

As artists sometimes we try to change and the world frowns upon it. Your friends, associates and even family are not used to the new “you” and if feels uncomfortable because it is unfamiliar to them. And as human beings, we fear and generally dislike the unfamiliar. Human nature has made us fear the unknown. You can’t change human nature.

A deep identity change through experience sometimes need to be maintained for it to take effect. Coming from from Brazil, I FEEL different. Yet, in my interactions since coming back for a week, some people still react the same way towards me, despite me having a totally different, more confident frame. Don’t let this discourage you. As you continue living your life in you new identity, more and more people will take notice. New friends will be introduced to the new you. Remember that public opinion always follows real change. Read more