Fallacies of the Seduction Community #1: Openers are a big deal

Problem: PUAs don’t know how to open, mis-calibrate on the open, or think too much about it.

Wrong Open

A PUA goes up to a set, walking in a clunky way. He stops awkwardly, and then suddenly, his face animates up and his voice blasts out, “Hey guys! Can I get a quick opinion on something!?!”

Correct Open

PUA walks slowly, taking him time around the room / street / venue. He makes eye contact with a girl standing by the bar. He has a slight smile. The smile is not for her, rather, his smile is for his own sense of comfort and ease in the current location. He’s smiling because he’s polite. He walks up to her, assessing her energy levels. He comes in smoothly, with the equal amount of energy of her current emotional state. He opens with “hi”, and then pauses to make sure he has her, or her group’s momentary attention. He then proceeds to deliver his first line, or whatever is on his mind. His body language is stable and confident, without neediness. If he recites a line, he does it in a way that is believable, as if that just happened to him.

Correct Execution

  • Too many newbies and guys open in a exaggerated way. They are unused to normal social cues. They subcommunicate: HEY! I’m a Pick Up Artist!! CHEESSY!
  • Opens are subtle, they are a piece you throw out to get the girl’s attention. They’re not meant to be “oh my God!” moments. In fact, the real test of who you are lies right after the open. The way you poise yourself as you communicate with her about life.
  • Openers are ways to begin the conversation, that’s it. No more, no less. Don’t milk the opener.
  • Openers should exert less energy than later on in the set – you shouldn’t be super high energy when opening people. It should be a relaxed, chilled out mode. Exceptions are made depending on your natural energy level and state, and the energy level of girls at the club. If the girls are in a high energy states, the PUA has to act in a high energy state (if he’s naturally lower energy) to hook the set.
  • A lot of guys run routines that seem like it requires them to “put on an act”.
  • This is a beginner actor’s flaw – it doesn’t seem genuine and subcommunicates they are acting. Have you ever seen bad acting? It is cringe worthy

Example of bad acting:

Example of good acting.

Notes one user: Heath Ledger lived alone in a hotel room for a month to prepare for his role as Joker, formulating the character’s posture, voice, and personality. He also had a diary in which he recorded the Joker’s thoughts and feelings.

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  • Comments

    4 Responses to “Fallacies of the Seduction Community #1: Openers are a big deal”
    1. Socialkenny says:

      The drift that I get from this post, is that you’re saying that cold approaching girls with opinion openers is a wrong move.

      Therefore, the PUA should stalk the target at the bar for a while then approach?

      • alphawolf says:

        I’m saying that delivering opinion openers, if it doesn’t mean anything personal to you (i.e. not calibrated, word for word) has to be done as if an actor is doing it for real on screen.

        Too many guys rehearse lines and then deliver it unnaturally. It has to be MEAN something.

        “Hey, I’m actually curious about this. Did you guys hear about the AVN Ball? They have naked adult actors and all, what do you think about that?”

        • Socialkenny says:

          Well that’s true. Being genuine will always be congruent (when you really are curious about something).

          I’m not making this a canned vs non-canned argument, but as an advanced PUA(as I am now), I’m able to rock canned openers with convincing ease and naturalism. Dudes don’t believe it when I say that I actually use canned routines to this day. I don’t see anything wrong with canned stuff. I don’t fumble them nowadays as I did as a newbie.

    2. Sandiago Rodriguez says:

      What is a good opener? Can you give an example. I have opened up using cheating girlfriend opener and it works pretty well. What kind of opener do you suggest. Also, let’s say if you get blown or rejected from a girl in a club in front of other groups does it affect your image in that venue. I keep on approaching until i get someone hooked. I just can’t be bothered about anyone judging me. What do u suggest?

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