Owen Cook (Tyler Durden) Talk at the SF Lair
Back in 2007, we used to host talks from Juggler, Zan, and Badboy at the pick up 101 mansion in Chinatown. Those days are long over. Tobias arranged the talk today at the Renaissance hotel and Owen Cook showed up to give us a talk.
For those of you who don’t know who Owen is, here’s a link. His talk was intimate and he relayed some realism to the whole world of pick up. When I first walked in he was wearing sun glasses and seemed bit distant.
As the talk progressed, he got to interact with the audience more, and explained that he had a prescription for the glasses and wasn’t trying to “be cool”. He touched upon several important topics:
1. Putting common sense and reality into pick up. What do you have to offer the girl? If you’re a male model or movie star, obviously you have some advantage. As a guy who does cold approach pick up, you will have an advantage over average guys. Pick up is not a holy grail. Guys who are good or are getting laid get lazy – they don’t have a need to go out. Only a PUA instructor constantly goes out because he needs the practice to do his job. It is unreasonable to assume someone will keep going out after he can consistently get laid or has a lifestyle that gets him laid. Therefore the cold approach skill set – very few people are good at it. At the same time, the OGs who master this, if you put them out in the field, within 1-2 weeks they will regain everything they’ve learned in their motor response.
2. Sacrifices, making choices – if you are a programmer who spends 12 hours a day to pick up, are you going to have time to go out? Probably not. But you could start a company and make millions. Life is about choices. Owen says, “I was watching Kobe the other day, and I think I have a shot at the NBA. If I train every day. Oh. I also want to be a meditation master too. That might take some time. Life is about choices. The choices we make, the sacrifices we make, because it is worth it”.
3. We saw field footage of Julien approaching girls and getting blown out. It was awesome. It puts reality back into place – everyone gets blown out. He then did some crazy buying temperature shit with a hot blonde in Hollywood.
4. 150 healthiest foods – good book to look-up for nutrition advice. General premise is that the food supply in the US has been saturated by fatty foods and non healthy foods. Simple foods poor people used to eat for cheap are now sold expensively in whole foods and “organic” outlets.
5. In the web 2.0 world, no one is going to spend 2-3k without seeing video content that makes them trust and feel like at least they know a bit about the instructor.
6. SHUT THE FUCK UP. And just go out and do it. Until you get 5-10 lays, hit it up at least 6 weeks of consistently going out, you should not engage in philosophical debate. It is just mental masturbation. These guys don’t know what they are talking about, and philosophical debates like, “what if this happens” is useless. There comes a time when action speaks louder than words.
The old, non commercial community was based on mutual respect and trust, much like fellow researchers/scientists:
Post: “guys, I went out, tried X, 3 times, on 10 sets, results are…”
Only these types of posts from legit people are taken seriously. Because marketing and money are now involved, the commercialism sets an unrealistic expectation of the game, with perfect “batting average”, when instead, in reality, the game is played via skill, persistence, and a dose of common sense and realistic adaptability. Tyler just seemed much more in touch with “reality” than most people, as it pertains to sexual relationships and dating.
7. Don’t be afraid to take on a persona and try it out. You never know if you might like it. The guy you’re now is not the same guy you were 10 years ago. Making developing your personality based on the choices you make, not the ones that are unconsciously fed to you or experience via chance.
8. Julien has some cool quotes in his in field footage:
- I cry, but in a manly way (Role Reversal)
- I love you. You’re a white trash whore. I love you. (BT Spike)
- You make me feel like the only girl in the world. (Role reversal)
- You laugh like a dog. That’s like the laugh of doom (Neg?)
- You are just saying that, or you are actually going to follow through and call me? (Qualify)
9. Outside, I was talking up 2 nurses and Owen stopped by to say hello. He joked he was going to blow this set and steal my girl. I watched. I was kind of hoping he would do it, just to watch what he would do. He was a gentleman and said hi, and then left. He had a cool way of leaving a charismatic presence, making his impact, and then leaving. I made out with one of the nurses just to see if I could do it and I did. She wasn’t super hot but it was nice to get a 15 min make out. Owen has a cool, stable alpha vibe with a mix of zen and grungy realism to him. Hard to explain unless you feel his energy in person. His eyes also speaks volumes. At one point he said, “look into my eyes and tell me I’m full of shit, or if I’m the real deal. You’ll know”. I realized then that only a man that is so committed to a path of his choosing can have eyes that look like that. Sounds romanticized I know but I believe it is true because I am starting to see my own path too.
Here’s a Owen Cook talk at another free event. Our talk wasn’t recorded.
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