Purity of the game

December 31, 2007 by Vince Lin  
Filed under Learn about Pickup

Seduction and sex isn’t always dirty. I realized this during a Yoga class recently. During the last 10 minutes of our Monday sessions, my friend and instructor C will ask us to lie on our backs, relax and let our thoughts flow. One day, my thoughts flowed to sex! Hot, steamy sex. But it wasn’t dirty! I felt clean. It was then that I had idea of “purity of game”. That is, your game flows so well, that it was just meant to happen. And sex, is something that’s not manipulative, but rather, 2 people enjoyed. For the woman, it is pleasure to meet a guy who understands her, and can join her in a sexual journey and is full of sensation, exploration and positive energy.

More recently, I came across listings for Bay area Tantric massages, as well as the book “The Multi-Orgasmic Man”. Don Diego probably knows more about this, but I plan to explore these avenues of Taoism / ancient Chinese Sex kong-fu. This door to a pure kind of sexual enjoyment is very interesting.

LL Cool J

December 21, 2007 by Vince Lin  
Filed under My Personal Life

Actually stands for “Ladies Love Cool James”. In his single, Loungin’ (Who Do You Love Remix) there were pieces of wisdom as it relates to pick up. See if you figure it out by listening to the lyrics again. It is story about a true player / ladies man knows how to please a woman. He doesn’t compensate for his other lack of qualities with money. The moral of the story? A woman needs love:

[LL Cool J]
Jew-als and Cristal gotta mack a phony style
He ain’t watchin you he rather watch his money pile
Can’t protect treasures when its in a glass house
Soon as he turn the corner I’ma turn that ass out
Full blown, frontin in the 6 wit the chrome
Yo B, why you leave your honey all alone wit me
Just because you blessed wit cash
doesn’t mean your honey won’t let me finesse that ass
So see the moral of the story is a woman need love
The kind you so-called players never dreamed of
You gotta try love, can’t buy love
If you play your hand then it’s bye-bye love

[Chorus]

[LL Cool J]
So what you got the cash flow and escro, damn
But your honey ran away like presto, ala-kazam
Man made the money, money never made the man
You still fakin jacks throwin rocks on her hand
See, you put your mack down now you Nino Brown
Rock roller wit’ so much ice your cap’s polar
I got em smokin beanies, modelin bikinis
Pushin ya whip on the freeway to see me
I keep it steamy, I make it burn when it’s my turn
Teachin shorty all the tools that you neva learned
Don’t get it twisted, gettin money ain’t wrong
But she wanna make love all night long, I’m gone

[Chorus]

“Let’s just be friends” – no, really!

December 2, 2007 by Vince Lin  
Filed under Learn about Pickup

I never really understood why some of my friends, in the past, have gotten angry or distant from me when I started gaming their friends. Questions like, “are your friends cute?” seem harmless, but they pack a certain punch if that is what you are asking a girl when she is inviting you out with her friends.

The realization came when Serum started gaming my roommate like it was another target. I realized immediately the pure inequality in the equation.

Roommate Friend = 6.5HB Asian girl
Serum = PUA
Risk of alienating me if relationship becomes more than friends: High
Risk of relationship not working out and being weird: High
Potential conflict of “whose house guest is this?”: Medium
Reward for full closing a HB6.5 Asian girl: relatively low
Weirdness of Serum sleeping in his old room overnight with roommate: High
Risk of jealously from best friend (Me) while gaming roommate: High

And to be honest, when I thought about this I just got really angry. Why risk a good friendship over a mediocre 6.5? IF she was a SHB10 Blonde, sure, got for it, I would be gaming her too but this is a case where the rewards do not justify the means.

Thinking more on this, I realized that most of my female friends (and I only have a few, as I do not easily make female friends and maintain relationships consciously) I introduce Serum to, he has somehow gamed. By gamed I mean, actively pursued 1 on 1 date like activities and attraction building (on purpose /i.e. consciously). And it is this feeling that I have that, when you have a PUA friend, they tend to game any other friend like a “target” that really pissed me off. This anger also made me realize what my other friends must think of me when I think of every girl as a potential target.

This event has made me realize that I don’t want to be that guy who is labeled “a player” and games every girl he sees. This is a DLV both in my co-worker circle as well as in other social circles. I want to be that cool guy that everyone meets, that the girls fall for over time without even thinking about it because of my charisma. And I want to be a man who appreciates his friends, and just because I have pick up skills, it does not mean I have to use them all the time. Having the mastery means having a choice: the choice between respecting friendships and sexual relationships, and being able to convey both and calibrate depending on the timing and circumstances.

Flow of the Game

November 23, 2007 by Vince Lin  
Filed under Learn about Pickup

One of my book reports back in my management consulting days focused around the book “Flow” by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (MC) Flow, according to MC is the mental state of operation in which the person is fully immersed in what he or she is doing, characterized by a feeling of energized focus, full involvement, and success in the process of the activity. Many other terms and idioms exist for this mental state: to be on the ball, in the zone, or in the groove.

MC identifies the following as accompanying an experience of flow:

1.Clear goals (expectations and rules are discernible and goals are attainable and align appropriately with one’s skill set and abilities).
2.Concentrating and focusing, a high degree of concentration on a limited field (a person engaged in the activity will have the opportunity to focus and to delve deeply into it).
3.A loss of the feeling of self-consciousness, the merging of action and awareness.
4.Distorted sense of time, one’s subjective experience of time is altered.
5.Direct and immediate feedback (successes and failures in the course of the activity are apparent, so that behavior can be adjusted as needed).
6.Balance between ability level and challenge (the activity is neither too easy nor too difficult).
7.A sense of personal control over the situation or activity.
8.The activity is intrinsically rewarding, so there is an effortlessness of action.
9.People become absorbed in their activity, and focus of awareness is narrowed down to the activity itself, action awareness merging (Csikszentmihalyi, 1975. p.72).

Note that not all are needed for flow to be experienced. The night I picked up my last HB8 girlfriend, as well as other nights in the city, mostly, I felt the feeling of flow. Your ego tends to subside, and you just flow with the energy of the location, the people, and the overall flow of the game. These are the best nights, because not only do you learn a lot, your skills are equal to the challenges you are facing in the club during the pickup. In a sense, you’ve seduced yourself, the nice club, and the people, both men and women. This is hard feat, but when you’re in “flow”, it is a great feeling. As an athlete, I realized what “flow” feels like back in 2004, when I did book report. I remember in basketball games, when I should 3 pointers and before the ball hit the rim, I knew the shot was going in. I could see my opponents making a move before they made it. (My nickname was “Beijing Bomber” on the high school basketball team).

So I encourage you to start small, maybe talking to a few strangers. Juggler took the 3 guys in his “Size doesn’t matter” show to a old ladies Bingo game. Mystery had his students in The Pickup Artist tell little girls stories. Start small, build you skills, and you eventually be in situation where you have the competent skills to pickup the girl you want in a club environment.

For Business or Love: Part 1 and 2

November 14, 2007 by Vince Lin  
Filed under My Personal Life

I wrote a brilliant business plan a year ago during Memorial weekend. It sat in my “Entrepreneurship” folder on my desktop for a year. This year, around September, I negotiated a deal with a previous web design firm that we hired in my management consulting days to launch a new site. I am behind on this initiative.

Every time I sit down to write something, my mind wanders into pick up, and I end up going out with Gonzo to pick up girls and run game. We have been going out with a group of Charisma Arts alums. Reading Juggler’s Method (JM) has been a great addition, although I personally find the lack of methodology a weak point for me, as I usually follows a routine a well scripted guideline when I go out. Gonzo’s game is much more casual and natural than mine.

Possible Solution
I don’t have a solution yet, but I would like to document the problem in this post. My mind tells me I should focus on building wealth, but my heart (and other body part) urges me to continue on this road of mastering pick up. Yusha P, my good Swedish PUA friend is also running into this problem. There comes a time when a man must make a decision to sacrifice short term entertainment for long term gain.

After some thought, I thought the Google model might work. “Build the platform”. If I can start a business/website that has reoccurring traffic and is generating some revenue, the element of TIME will only be an addition to my wealth. This is a similar concept to owning real estate. Wealth grows. I have confidence that I can do this, having graduated from the best business school in the world for entrepreneurship.

On the other side of the coin, my PU skills have lagged since my “San Francisco Apartment by the Bridge SOMA” days. I went out last Saturday, and I had AA opening! I ended the night talking to a HB9.5 for 30 minutes, and I negged too hard. On closing, I asked her why she would not give me her number, hoping at least for some feedback despite the fact that I had this super hot girl in my sight but bombed the set. She said she was actually a nice girl and that I was too mean. I don’t have a platform for PU. In other words, it has been almost 9 months since I moved to Sunnyvale, CA and I don’t have a social circle built where I can have girls for regular sex. This is not a “incremental platform” and if no action is taken, I am going to be worse off alone.

So I sit here, in front my my computer. Wondering. Do I pursue my business plan, focus on that, and develop a sustainable income stream over the next few months? Do I spend my weekends going out and mastering PU? I am leaning towards mastering PU. My reasoning is this – it is unhealthy for a peaking 24 year old to remain sex-less. It is actually affecting my mentality. Ideally, I’d like to do both. Today, Tom Perkins came to give a talk at work. I asked him afterward, “A friend from business school recently give me this piece of advice: ‘you can lose a lot of money chasing girls, but you will never lose the girls chasing money. What is your take on his advice?”. I got a laugh from him, and his response was, “well, I do have a long list of resumes for the Mrs. Perkins position. I suppose being a VC and Writer is a good combination”.

Going Deeper on Money vs. Sex
I started thinking about what wealth and love really means. Mystery has noted Wealth, Health and Money. I am a healthy 24 year old. I have nice style. For those of us in business and entrepreneurship, hopefully we understand that Money is merely an instrument of exchange. It is a tool that reflects what we are willing to trade, or, if you really dig deeper, our true desires. Money in and of itself is useless. It is money’s ability to purchase other things of value to you that is its essence.

Sex is more simple – it is that animal urge to spread your genes. But wait, relationships are important too. As Zan said, it is about connecting with people. In his recent talk at UC Berkley, one of the PUAs noted that Zan said today, we don’t bond at campfire anymore. Instead, people sit on the couch alone and watch TV. We have created a culture that craves companionship. I think this is so true. So yes, I want regular sex, but more importantly, I want to connect with one of the most beautiful things that God has created in this realm – that of a beautiful (both mind and body) woman.

My Goal for Myself
My goal is to develop the skill set to get consistent lays. I also want to launch my new site and business by end of year. I will report back on my progress…


The Dilemma

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