Business vs. Love Part 5

You know the feeling.

Friend calls you up to go out, there’s an event at a bar. Same scene, same girls. You wonder if you should muster up the courage and energy to go out, or decide to stay in and make some progress on that website you have been trying to launch in the past 6 months.

Scenario 2 – you have been doing well at work lately – new job and new promotion. 2% salary raise. Yeh. You decide to go out more this week with your friends. You get a few number closes, but none of them return or pick up when you text/call. You wonder where your game has gone wrong, and after a while decide “fuck it” and focus on some other area in your life. Maybe you’ll muster up the anger or motivation to call up a few PU friends and ask for their advice, but ultimately, the game dynamics go back to you.

You go back to focus on work, but you realize that you are working your ass off for your company and they are making all of the money. The constant ass kissing and power maneuvers at work get to you. You decide to start your own company on the side. You do some research and work, but really have no idea where to start. You write a business plan.

A friend’s birthday comes up – you decide to go. You hit it off with this girl, and decide your game isn’t so bad after all. You go out a few more times over the next 2 weeks – some nights are good, some night are not. A lot of effort is being put into this and the results of lays is not showing.

If the above 5 paragraphs sound remotely familiar, that is because I have experienced it first hand. I have been writing these “Business vs. Love” posts for…. 1 year now!

It took a some simple advice from one group member, a Stanford PhD student at our MasterAlliance meeting to wake up me, “R, maybe there are just excuses? I mean, when I didn’t want to work out, I was throwing out the exact same reasoning as you. These are just excuses that stand in your way. Maybe I am wrong, but think about it.”

He’s right. The truth is, if it came down to it, I would choose love over money. Because love transcends material things, even this life, money is only a tool we use to trade things of perceived value in this world. But achieving both often means going after something the right way. You want to pickup a girl? Focus and learn from each set’s mistake. Don’t over analyze your sets, and focus on your skill set. Film yourself if you have to to see your flaws.

Waiting for that business plan? It is not going to write itself. Stop watching porn and if you are going to blow off your friends, make a commitment to finish 20% of that plan by the time you go to sleep. These are things that are definite and require energy, but the fact is sometimes this pain of exerting energy is better than the pain of mind-numbing and time passing that comes from doing a lot of things that are 1. half assed and 2. not significant anyway.

“With Scarcity comes Clarity” – Sergey said recently in the economic downturn, and this is another sage advice that I am lucky enough to see working at Google.

In Sickness, In Health

I got the fever, bad in the past 2 weeks. The days off work as I was recovering, I thought about my life in more depth than I have in a while. At the end of the day, a important question came to mind: If I died tomorrow, would I have lived a good life? Who would really remember me? Mom called, ex girlfriends called. A handful of friends called, but I realized that I did not have any hot female friends. That is, aside from a few from college, I currently do not have any really beautiful HB female friends. (By really beautiful, think HB8+ (potential to be a model). A few lessons came to mind

1. David DeAngelo said in his teachings to make 5 HB8+ friends of girls who you would like to date, but befriend them. Having these girls in your life will teach you the things you need to know about the inner workings, thoughts and the lifestyles of these women. Moreover, they will constantly supply you with their group of HBs.

2. Badboy, when he visited us in SF said that having girls will not make you happy. I am starting to finally understand what he means. Having girlfriends… while you get regular sex, is not a “happy” feeling. In other words, I would rather have deep relationships with 5 GFs/ex GFs – have both a friend and sexual relationship with all of them, than date 10 girls who I have no connection with.

3. Mystery said that being a mPUA is a lifestyle. As such, you MUST be a guy who enjoys going out, and always have something going on. If you are not a club person, Masters/Doc has many GFs and specializes in harem management by throwing social parties and wine parties. I realized that while I enjoy going out, this enjoyment has been adapted in order to become better at pickup. I would rather have a nice night out at the movies or at a restaurant, and I realized this recently. A perfect day for me, is a day spent in relaxation and happiness. It could be a day at the amusement part – a day at a museum where I learned something. Going to a club, while drinking, dancing is nice, is not what I am after at the end of the tunnel. However, being able to hold my own in a club, learning how to peacock and initiative conversations, these are very important skills to master in one of the most dangerous hunting grounds – the dance/loud club.

As I recovered, I am putting picking up girls on hold to figure out what I really want in life. Only then can I truly have clarity around my thoughts about PU.